How to Become a Happier Person

Where are you looking for happiness?

Studies show that our personal happiness is …

50% Predisposition/The way we were born.

10% Circumstances: You got it. Only around 10% of our happiness has to do with our situation and circumstances.

40% Our intentional activities.  This is what we can change.

Lyubomirsky, S. (2008) The How of Happiness. New York: Penguin.

Several weeks ago, I attended an all day workshop called Happiness: How Positive Psychology Changes Our Lives.  The workshop was taught by Lynn D. Johnson, Ph.D. who has spent the last twenty years researching happiness.  Dr. Johnson shared his research on the benefits to being a happier person along with proven interventions that increase general happiness.

Dr. Johnson, thank you for sharing your valuable and extremely enlightening research with us.

Take a look at the above percentages.  Focus on that 40%.  Even if you were born a generally grumpy person who has encountered many hardships, you can become, according to studies, 40% happier.

This is very empowering research.  It implies that regardless of your predisposition and circumstances you have a lot of influence over your general well-being.  This means that your actions are about four times more powerful than your circumstances when it comes to determining your general level of happiness. This helps explain why some individuals are able to bounce back easier than others after experiencing extreme hardship.

 What the research tells us about happier people.

  • They often have the same pain and trauma as people who describe themselves as unhappy.
  • Their happy disposition helps them bounce back quicker.
  • They are less likely to have a heart attack.  Men ages 65-80 who scored higher on an optimism scale had fewer heart attacks than men who scored lower on the same scale.
  • They are less likely to get diabetes.  Worry raises diabetes risk.
  • They are less likely to get cancer.  Optimism reduces risk of cancer.
  • They make better leaders.  Positive emotion helps leadership skills.
  • Happy people have significantly better overall health.
  • Marty Seligman found that among Met Life agents strong optimists outsold moderate optimists. 21% the first year, 57% the second year.. and the difference continues to grow.  Money did not bring happiness, but optimism brought money.
  • Wealth did not increase happiness, but regular exercise, gratitude, and acts of kindness did.

How to be happier:  Interventions that increase happiness.

  • Practicing gratitude:  ”Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others.” -Cicero
  • Jotting down the names of people who have been kind to us even in seemingly small ways.
  • Writing a letter of gratitude to someone and actually reading it to them.
  • Keeping a gratitude journal.  Recording something everyday.
  • Identifying our top three strengths and figuring out ways to build on them.
  • Exercising: Studies have shown that regular exercise increases happiness and decreases depression.
  • Trying to get between 7-9 hours of sleep every night.
  • Researching and practicing good nutrition. It is a key to happiness.
  • Doing random acts of kindness without expecting anything in return.
  • Meditating. It improves lifestyle, reduces stress, and adds emotional resiliency.
  • Praying, attending religious services, and believing in something bigger than ourselves.
  • Setting and achieving short-term and long-term goals.
  • Connecting to other people.
  • Smiling often.
  • Reframing challenges in our lives as learning opportunities. (Looking for the blessing in disguise)

For optimal results, really work hard at one or two of these interventions over the next twelve weeks.

Johnson’s research suggested that it is more effective to incorporate several of these interventions into our lives rather than trying to do them all at one time.  He suggested that less is more when trying to make lifestyle changes.  Doing too many new things at once can be overwhelming.  For these interventions to work, they should be practiced everyday for twelve weeks so that they become habitual.  Any change that is going to last must be practiced and practiced and practiced some more.

Please share this information.  Way too many people are stuck thinking that their happiness is 100% dependent on their circumstances and on other people. This simply is not true. It is our thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors that make such a big difference.

English: A table illustrating statistics menti...

English: A table illustrating statistics mentioned in the source’s journal article (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

references

Fredrickson, B. (2000). Cultivating positive emotions to optimize health and well-being. Prevention & Treatment, 3.

Giltay, E. et al., (2006). Optimism and the Risk of Cardiovascular Death. The Zutphen Elderly Study. Achives of Internal Medicine, 166, 431-436.

Johnson, Lynn, Ph.D, Enjoy Life! Healing with Happiness. (2008).  http:enjoylifebook.com

Peled, R. (2008) Breast Cancer, Psychological Distress and Life Events among Young Women. BMC Cancer (8:245)

Seligman, M.E.P. (1992) Learned Optimism. New York: Pocket.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/7524096.stm

*This article is written for your information only.  It is not intended to be medical advise.  If you experience extreme sadness, helplessness, and hopelessness for several days, please consult your physician.

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Comments

  1. Valentina says:

    All good advices Kristin, thank you.

  2. I’m happy but I like the list of things to do to be even happier. Very healthy advice. Being grateful for what we have is a big factor. The first four items on the list involve gratitude. After that comes doing things for others without expecting gratitude in return. I like this list.

  3. I’ve been learning from Brene Brown’s studies on Vulnerability, Shame, and Wholeheartedness. She has a few TED talks. It seems that there’s also a component of feeling that we are “enough” and other such things that help us to walk into vulnerability bravely that also lead to full lifestyles with less shame. Interesting stuff!

  4. I called my son today to tell him how grateful I was that he was worried that I would be alone during Christmas (the captain prob won’t be home) and he was going to fly here for a week to be with me instead of going to England to be with his wife’s family and then flying there a week late. It would meant a lot of flying for him. What a sweetheart, and I told him so, and how much I appreciated how he was concerned about me.

  5. I hit reply b4 I was done. One last thing. I told him I would be fine, and he should be with his wife, although of course I’d love to hang out with him.

  6. This would make for an interesting challenge. Choose one and document the process for 12 weeks.

  7. Todd Lohenry says:

    Great post, Kristin! It goes together with this one from Karen Salmansohn like peanut butter and jelly: http://toddlohenry.com/2012/11/11/want-to-see-huge-change-in-your-life/. Karen’s encouragement? Practice the Japanese art of continuous improvement by changing behaviors for only 15 minutes at the beginning. We can all tolerate doing something different for only 15 minutes, right? It can, however, have a profound impact on how you look at life and how others look at you…
    :-D

  8. Anonymous says:

    excellent post… The power of positive thinking (*_*)

  9. Shannon says:

    I KNOW this is true. “Happy is what we make it…always has been, always will be” reads the sign hanging above the kitchen entrance. When people accuse me of being in La-la Land most of the time (it’s true, I can find a rainbow and sunshine just about anywhere), I will now throw the 40% number at them instead of just saying, “Do as I do; it works.” Because it really does.

    Love, love, love your posts, Kristin!

  10. This is an amazing post! Thank you for sharing this with us.

  11. Solid. (As usual) Period.

  12. Great article again Kristin! I think that of all the good advice here, practicing grattitude is the most powerful one. When I’ve been between rock and the hard place, actively practicing grattitude has helped me to remain positive and bounce back quickly. Thanks!

  13. Great info, thanks for sharing!

  14. Sloan says:

    Reblogged this on fibrohappiness and commented:
    Another great post from Let Life In Practices.

  15. Very enlightening research!

  16. colormusing says:

    I agree wholeheartedly with all of this, particularly about gratitude; it’s pretty hard to be miserable when I’m focusing on the wonderful people/circumstances/things in my life!

  17. Very informative blog.

  18. great suggestions!

  19. Marty says:

    Thank you, incredible studies if how the mind impacts our whole being. euro science details now, what fires together wires together, what we ignore fades quickly. that means what we think about grows, what we ignore dies.

    One practice that impacted my life was giving up judgment. When I let situations, people and my ego(cognitive mind) thoughts flow on by without thought, life exploded with opportunity.

    Staying in this moment solved most of my unhappiness, not running from anything but letting the storyline go, and observing intimately strong emotions and thought. Our fear and worry are transparent buried in thought.

    Another secret is to take action, mental and physical and the mind shifts. Action overcomes thought and emotion everytime. We heal ourselves from the inside to be happy. Must my opinion.

  20. kiaman2012 says:

    Thank you!

  21. Thank you for sharing my post! :)

  22. Thank you so much for sharing my post with your readers.

Trackbacks

  1. [...] Get the rest here: How to Become a Happier Person – Let Life in Practices [...]

  2. [...] to. Kristen Barton Cuthriell over at Let Life in Practices wrote just such a post. It is called How to Become a Happier Person. I think we all need to read it. To get to it, you can click [...]

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