What your child needs most from you is for you to not need your child.
I first heard this from my friend and colleague, Dr. Paul VanValin, a clinical psychologist.
“What?” you may ask. As I originally did.
“Of course I need my child. I love my child!”- you may say.
Our children need us to be there for them- physically, mentally, and emotionally. Not the other way around. They need us- they don’t want us to need them. If we need them they live a life so consumed with our needs, that they forget that they have any of their own. And this has potential life-long consequences. [Read more...]