Tag Archives: overcoming adversity

Are You a Carrot, an Egg, or a Coffee Bean?

are you are carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?Most of the patients at the acute inpatient psychiatric hospital where I worked had endured unimaginable hardships that left them feeling hopeless. If there was one thing that I really wanted them to have before they left our facility, it was renewed hope.

At the end of our group therapy each day, I would share an uplifting story with them. Are You a Carrot, an Egg, or a Coffee Bean? was one of my favorites. (Especially the end) It has been around awhile so you may have heard it, but it is one of those stories you may want to read again and again.

Are You a Carrot, an Egg, or a Coffee Bean? Continue reading

Post Traumatic Growth: Why Do Some Bounce Back?

post traumatic growthA New York Times article written by Jim Rendon discusses “post traumatic growth” and includes five areas of positive transformation following a life changing struggle.

In this post, I share with you those five areas of transformation and explain why some people are able to experience amazing personal growth following trauma while others deteriorate.

Richard Tedeschi and Lawrence Calhoun, psychologists and researchers at the University of North Carolina studied more than 600 trauma survivors and heard the same thing over and over again.  Continue reading

How to Let Go of Resentment

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How to Let Go of Resentment

Is resentment holding you back from living a more peaceful, joyful, and confident life? Do you feel like you have been wronged, judged, or mistreated in some way? Do you ruminate about it and play it over and over in your head? Do you feel your anger increasing the more this internal tape is played?

The purpose of this post is to

  1. Tell you that you are not alone!
  2. Help you let go of resentment.

First of all, you are not alone! People filled with resentment fill the waiting room of the psychotherapy practice where I work everyday. Millions of others are drowning in resentment and get no help at all. We all feel resentment from time to time. We have all been hurt, judged, and rejected at some point in our lives. Unfortunately, this is part of being human. We are going to experience joy and pain as life ebbs and flows.

You may be thinking, “Yes, we all experience pain, but you have no idea what I have been through!” 

You’re right. I don’t. I can’t even imagine! If you told me your situation, I could try to imagine and I could empathize, but I have not experienced the exact same thing as you. Even when two people share a similar experience such as a history of abuse, divorce, infidelity, or the loss of a loved one, their situations differ and they experience the crisis differently.

Although we each experience our pain, anger, and frustration in our own way, and some of us have experienced more trauma and pain than others, we have all been hurt and there are things that we can do to help release the resentment that takes up residence in our hearts and in our minds.

Release the resentment that resides within. The only thing worse than someone else hurting you in the past, is for you to continue to hurt yourself for the rest of your life. Your resentment poisons YOU, not the one who harmed you.

If you are tired of being angry and resentful, here is what you can do. Continue reading

Great Quotes on Overcoming Obstacles

overcoming obstaclesOvercoming Obstacles

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.” -Helen Keller

“Others can stop you temporarily- you are the only one who can do it permanently.” -Zig Ziglar

“Obstacles don’t have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don’t turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.” -Michael Jordan

“Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goals.” -Henry Ford

“A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.” -Christopher Reeve

“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, “I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.” You must do the thing you think you cannot do.” -Eleanor Roosevelt

If you are going through a difficult time right now, know your situation will change. You will not feel like this forever. Depending on your situation, your life may be permanently altered, but eventually your pain will decrease, opportunities will present themselves, and you will find joy again.  xoxo Kristin